Jeff Kent has demonstrated beyond any doubt that he has an advanced degree from justsc.  That sort of advanced education is the only way that Jeff's mind could have decided, "Hey, I haven't made a total fool of myself for ... let's see, several hours.  How about if I bad mouth Vinnie":

Dodger second baseman Jeff Kent made it clear in this interview with Los Angeles Times columnist T.J.  Simers that anyone who thinks Manny Ramirez has helped him has no idea what he is talking about.

This despite Kent hitting .500 since Ramirez's arrival and raising his batting average by 20 points.

The Dodgers' Hall of Fame broadcaster, incurred Kent's rath for mentioning it on his broadcast.

"Vin Scully talks too much," Kent said about a guy who has made a living for six decades with perhaps the most iconic voice in baseball history.

When Simers pointed out that Scully was making the same point as a lot of people, Kent answered "see my answer to the first question. Listen, I'm so tired of talking about this stuff. It diminishes my whole career and all the hard work. I take it as an insult."

There is no one in the world more down on announcers than I am, but I have nothing bad to say about Vinnie.  Sure, I've heard him make a mistake or two, but he made no more when I left LA than he did when he moved to LA.  Kent, who will be remembered about as long as Jeff Hamilton.  Vinnie taught baseball and to two or three generations of Californians.  Jeff has alienated all of them with one stupid statement.  What in the world was he thinking.

OK, Jeff, OK.  It's all Vinnie's fault.  Someday they'll make a movie about Vinnie, and call it Amadeus.  And the opening of the show will have F. Murray Abraham playing Jeff Kent in the nuthouse.  

Yahoo Sports has a link to an article on Rivals by Terry Bowden about a guy who many wanted to see in Westwood - Paul Johnson.  Terry points out that Coach Johnson is just like another guy that many of us wanted, Coach Leach, in that each runs a multiple option offense except one is geared to the run and the other is geared to the pass.  Read the whole article; it's interesting.

I was very solidly on board the Leach Bandwagon.  I would also have been comfortable aboard the Johnson Bandwagon.  But in retrospect, I now have my doubts about both.  Sorry, vegans, but I think eating only chlorophyll based organisms is goofy.  And sorry, Dr. What's your name with your sirloin steak only diet, I think eating only meat is, let us say, unusual.  What's the matter with a nice salad before settling into a nice porterhouse? 

I think the balanced diet we ended up with will be better for us than either of the extremes mentioned by Coach Bowden.  I have no science here.  But we saw what happened to our vaunted offense when the entire world, including people who had never heard of football, knew that our first two plays were going to be runs.  And we also saw what happened when the game situation forced us to pass on every down.  The geezers will support me when I mention that nobody knew what was coming with Coach Prothro calling the plays.  And the same was true when Homer Smith was on the sideline and even with Coach Toledo.  I think Coach Neuheisel and Coach Chow will be innovative enough to make our offense better even with an empty cupboard in terms of linemen.  I have no science or analysis to back me up on this - just a gut feel.  But I don't think we'll have to wait too long to see a successful offense serpentining out of the huddle for the Bruins. 

Read Bowden's article.

Bumped. Good luck to all BNers, Bruins next week. GO BRUINS. - N

Norcal mentioned that the Bar Exam is coming up soon.  Normal people can just skip the rest of this.  To you brothers and sisters who are going to take it, let me give my annual couple of do's and don'ts.

Do type the exam.  I do know how many people hand-write them nowadays, but in my time (circa 1974) there were relatively few typists.  I think a typed paper is easier to read and consequently more "likeable."  There are stats which showed (again circa 1974) that typed exams got an average grade three points higher than hand-written exams.

Do spend time outlining the answer.    The bar review guys said in my day that of the 52.5 minutes available for each question, you should spend 30 organizing and outlining your answer.  It's hard to resist jumping right in and pounding the keyboard, but don't do it.  An organized answer will come across better.  I was told  by a guy who graded the exams that they are looking to pass people, and the more organized the answer, the more likely he was to set your answer in the "passed" stack.

Do take pains to write clearly.  All the stuff you learned in school about writing means something.  Remember the IRAC method.  Use it.  Remember that short sentences are better than long sentences.  Keep the sentence structure simple.  Don't start a sentence with the word "because."  Don't use passive voice.  Use vivid verbs.

Don't be timid about citing cases.  If you can cite a case, do so.  If you remember a quote, quote it.  (I still remember this one from Palsgraf (or at least I think it was Palsgraf) - "The harm that occurred is the very harm, the risk of which is what made the conduct unreasonable."  If you know a particular case stands for a particular point but have blanked on the name, describe it.  Maybe the reader will have the same sort of memory you do and you'll connect.  But you're at least conveying the notion that you know there's a case on point that proves your point.

Don't forget to sleep.  It's highly unlikely that you'll discover the magic pill that will reveal all the answers at 3:00 a.m. the night before the test.  It's more likely that you'll get so mentally and physically tired that you'll be adversely affected come game time. 

Don't panic.  Be relaxed.  Be smooth, like Joe DiMaggio rather than frenetic, Willie Mays.  If you don't have a clue about what you're looking at, start with the basics that you learned in the bar review courses.  If the question says to assume the California Probate Code applies, then it's a Wills question.  If the word "Blackacre" is in it, it's pretty likely to be real property. 

Do be confident.  Believe me when I tell you that there are some very stupid lawyers out there, and they all have one thing in common.  Despite their incredible stupidity, they passed the bar.  Have faith in yourselves and your education and your basic smarts.  You can do this.  You've been a success at all your academic efforts.  You got into UCLA.  You scored high enough on the LSAT.  You got admitted to law school.  You graduated from law school.  There will be people in that room who can't say all those things.  There will be people in that room who have taken the test many times and are never going to pass it.  You and the other smart, successful peole are not your competition - they are.  And you can write a better exam than they can.  How do I know this?  All the stats in the world say so. 

I'm sure other folks who have gone through it will have other thoughts for you.  Good luck, brothers and sisters.

According to Yahoo Sports just a few minutes ago, Baron Davis has opted out of a 17 bazillion dollar contract with the Philadelphia Warriors of the Goldden State of San Francisco, and wants to return to Los Angeles.  But the news that will hurt lots of my brothers and sisters in the BN, he is looking at the Buffalo Braves of the San Diego Clippers of Los Angeles.  (I confess, I have been affected by Arte Moreno.)

I now head off topic and out for the golf course in the Tampa Area, which is close to the home field of the St. Petersburg Rays of Tampa Bay, currently the proud possessor of the best record in baseball.  (But seriously folks, to tell you what it's like for the dozen or so of us Rays fans, the team is like the early 60's Dodgers with speed, not much power, and really good pitching, or the mid-80's Royals, with lots of guys who could hit line drives everywhere and pretty good pitching.  I had the privilege of living in LA and in KC for those teams, and I'm telling you, the Rays really remind me of those teams.  They really think they can win.  I'm not going to disagree with them.)

According to an article on Yahoo by Dan Wetzel, Brandon Jennings may decide to play professionally in Europe rather than professionally at Arizona next year.  OK, I don't know how to link to Wetzel's article, so shoot me.

I think that's a good idea for guys like Jennings or OJ2 -- guys who are just filling space at a college and taking a scholarship that could be given to an actual student athlete.  Sure, we have our own one-an-dones, but if Jennings sets a precedent here, it could end that fiction.  Get rid of the artificial barrier to entry into the NBA.  Let anyone in who can qualify.  But make it clear that you get one decision only - if you elect to go professional, you don't get to play college ball.  And if you play college ball, then you're ineligible for the NBA until your class graduates.

 

With the Irrelevant Tournament (aka the Pac 10 Tournament) the only thing on tap for the next week or so, I think it's time that we looked ahead to football season.  I propose that we pick an aluminum (plurals and singulars of alumni is not my strong suit) reunion game and get together at the Rose Bowl.  My preference would be August 30 against Fresno State.  It is but a coincidence that my last remaining trial in Southern California just got continued to August 26.

I think going to the beginning of the Neu Era would be an appropriate game for us all to meet.  And planning it now will enable the out-of-Staters to procure low cost airline tickets.

I expect our team to do well.  Coach Neuheisel has managed to get all the fans pretty excited, and I am confident that he will do the same with the players.  The offense in particular has to be jumping for joy now that a real offensive coach has arrived.  (I still can't get over how CTS was so proud and exuberant about the last guy he hired as OC.  Frankly, I'm not sure I even remember that guy's name.)  

Anyway, what's the feeling for a reunion get-together on August 30?

(Nestor, you'll have to grit your teeth or look completely the other way at this one.)

For reasons totally beyond my comprehension, the Yankees spring training site is in Tampa, right across the street from Raymond James Stadium, where Bucs work on their WCO on Sundays.  Apparently the City Fathers forgot that the Rays are in town, and Yankees are the arch enemy.  (How would you like having justsc have its spring practice at Spaulding?)  But I digress.

The Yankee presence for some reason requires an extraordinary amount of Yankee news.  Anyway, the fishwrap decided to quote the New York Times magazine, Play, which quoted Hank Steinbrenner, who was taking some shots at the "Red Sox Nation" as a creation of ESPN.  He said to "go anywhere in America and wou won't see Red Sox hats and jackets, you'll see Yankee hats and jackets."  I would suggest to Steinbrenner fils that he should get out of the Bronx a little.  I was in Manhatten last week, and I saw zero Yankee hats or jackets.  But that's not the point.

(Jim Healy tape now -- "Get to the point, will you Jim.")

The Steinbrenner quote ends with this little dandy:  "We're going to put the Yankees back on top and restore the universe to order."

You know, Hank, I seem to have heard that one before.  And it wasn't a quote from a Yankee.  It was from a Bruin, and a full-fledged member of the Bruins Nation.  Hank, show a little class.  Your figure of speech was surely a nice one, and it was nice when Bill Walton said it a few months ago.  All you had to do was to say, "As Bill Walton would say ..." or something like that.
But no.

Which reminds me of Joe Biden, of course.  I just saw him on TV.  He talks just like (and is starting to look just like ) George Carlin.  I'm going to start watching C-Span to see if he does the bit about the difference between baseball and football.  But again I digress.

In any event, Nestor, talk to your close personal friend Hank.  Tell him that we like the obvious reference to UCLA basketball in his language, but he shouldn't just blatantly plagiarize.

There's a story in Yahoo Sports about Kimberly Noah getting suspended by his team for a game.  

Chicago Bulls rookie Joakim Noah was benched for Sunday's game against the Atlanta Hawks -- by his teammates.

They delivered a unanimous vote after the rookie from Florida was involved in a confrontation with assistant coach Ron Adams in practice before Friday's game at Philadelphia.

Noah was inactive for the Philadelphia game for internal disciplinary reasons, but the players told interim coach Jim Boylan one game was not enough.

It looks like Kimberly was not really ready to make the jump to the NBA, with his head being up his rear end and all.  But I'm sure he took the news with equanimity - just a few screams and chest thumps.  

Somehow this sort of thing doesn't surprise me.  From what I saw of him at Florida, it seemed to me that he thought basketball was pretty much an individual sport.  He was obviously a good player, but just as obviously a jerk.  In my opinion, lots of guys like Noah could really benefit from spending time under a coach who coached the whole person, not just the basketball player.  

Something tells me that Afflalo is not going to get benched by his teammates.

I went back to an August 10 post and got the list of 21 reasons why CTS should be fired.  I have tried to update them, but this should probably be double-checked by McCloskey.  (I have highlighted numbers that I changed and explained the change in parenthises)

CTS's Record

1.  1-4 against Southern Cal.  (Thanks to a nice game that showed us having more punts (11) than first downs (10) and showed us going 0 for 11 on third down)
   
2.  No Pac-10 championships.  (This year tied for fourth)
   
3.  No BCS bowl games.
   
4.  1-11 on the road against teams with a winning record. (We only played one team on the road that had a winning record at the time - justsc.)
   
5.  Worst starting 3- AND 4- AND 5- year record of any UCLA football coach since Billy Barnes, including Bob Toledo who was fired.  (Records (ties not counted):  CTS - 35-27 (564); Toledo - 35-23 (603); Donahue - 38-17 (691); Vermeil 15-5 (750); Rodgers 19-12 (612); Prothro 35-13 (729); Barnes 26-22 (541).)
   
6.  Worse winning percentage than Bob Toledo, who was fired, and worst winning percentage since Barnes, who was fired.
   
7.  5-13 against ranked teams.  (wins against Cal and Oregon, losses against ASU and justsc)
   
8.  4-9 against top 10 teams.  (wins against Cal and Oregon, losses against ASU and justsc)
   
9.  Only 7 conference wins against teams who finished over .500.
   
10. 24-18 against Pac-10 teams.
    
11.  11-19 against teams with a winning record. (Wins against BYU, Cal, OU, losses to ASU, justsc)
    
11.  14 losses to unranked teams.  (Utah, ND, WSU, AZ)
    
12.  He has a losing record after October, 7-15. (win against Oregon, losses to AZ, WSU, justsc)
    
16.  Embarrassing losses to Wyoming, Fresno State, Arizona, Southern Cal, Utah, Notre Dame.
    
17.  Revolving door for assistant coaches (25 in 5 years).  (I made no changes here.)
    
18.  4th OC in 5 years, 4th OL coach in 5 years.  (I made no changes here.)
    
19.  4th in conference standings during his 4 years.  (I didn't make a change here - we were fourth this year, and I figured it would still be fourth if I did a bunch of calculating.)
    
20.  4th in conference record during his 4 years.  (No changes here, either.)
    
21.  5th in conference in overall during his 4 years.  (Ditto.)

22.  And while it's fresh in our minds, against justsc, the team had more punts (11) than points (7) and we were 0 for 11 on third down.)

I would also add the following stats from this year, CTS's fifth with his "unstoppable" West Coast Offense:

Points per game:  22.9 (92nd in D-1)
Yds per game:  335.1 (96th)
Pass yds:  2220 or 185 per game (98th)
Rush yards:  1801 or 150 per game (64th)
3rd down %:  32.1 (106th)
4th downs made:  4 (115th)
Penalties:  92 (101st)  (Note:  I can't tell if these are offensive or defensive or both - I assume both)
Penalty yards:  761 (92nd)
Time of possession:  28:35 (98th)

And for the Dy-No-Mite fanatics, try these numbers.  (I haven't looked to see what they were before Dy-No-Myte took over.)

Points per game:  22.8  (34th out of 119)
yds per game:  349.8 (36th)
Pass yards:  2812 or 234.3 per game (70th)
Rush yards:  1385 or 115.4 per game (25th)

My take on Dy-No-Mite - roughly a third of his colleagues are better than him.  (Maybe to be more accurate, a third of his colleagues produce better results than he does.)

Anyone want to enhance these numbers and send them to DG with a nice cover note?

The discussion was about the dearth of Black head coaches in D-1.  He said there had to be more open mindedness on the part of athletic directors to interview Black candidates.  OK, nobody disagree with that.  

Then he posted his list of "viable candidates."  Number two on the list -

Please go to the bathroom and empty whatever it is that might cause problems.  Have nothing in your mouth that will cause a spit-take.  Once you've done that continue reading.

- was Jay Norvill of our own UCLA Bruins.

That really shows me that Mark May did some heavy analysis.  Yep, of all the coaching candidates from all the gin joints in the world, he had to walk into Jay Dorvell.

Quick, DG.  Promise Training Jay whatever has to be promised to get him to stay and keep that WCO producing win after win after win.  

If nothing else establishes the lack of credibility of the MSM, the suggestion that Training Jay is a viable candidate to be a head coach in Division 1 should solidly do so.  Training Jay has zero qualifications.

There was no suggestion that Training Jay or any of the other candidates start at a Junior College or at some D-2 school.  No, Mark May and the MSM thinks that these guys should do their OJT at a D-1 school, which could include my alma mater.  Hey Mark - here's a headline for you.  We tried that experiment and it didn't work.